Unstuck.

I was a drone, a zombie, a woman that woke each day to complete her tasks just to repeat them uneventfully.  I was placated by the normalcy of my life.  I was comfortably numb. Life was, for me, as simplistic as it could possibly get, and I was fine with that.

My love of fairy tales, folklore, myths, and the unknown is what sparked me to write from the heart.  It's not always easy, but you will never fail with being true to yourself.

I have failed miserably in both the love and writing parts of my life, but when I merge the two I don't care.  I am infallible.

I can rule the world and never care if there were ever a critic to judge me on how well I write.  I could erase the rules and make them mine. I declare there will never be punctuation from hence forth.  I am the queen of my MY world.

He makes me this way, and I love him.

I have my King.  He is rough around the edges, but he is completely gooey on the inside and I adore him.

I have my two Princes.  They are my babies, and my loves. They will forever be the reason that I breathe, and the rocks that ground me.

I don't know if it was that hug, that kiss, or just his smile, but this sleeping beauty is awake.

My King is my "Prince Charming".

I am finally....Unstuck.

Lyn Hernandez
3/12/2012

Alive

I set out to find the perfect words...
sought the most beautiful images...
and imagined the grandest of canvas' to paint our world.
A gift, from me, to declare my adoration.
Our Masterpiece would be yellow, but not of age.
It would hold the happiness, giggles, and sneaky smiles.
There would be images of fish, deer, snow, and wind.
We would be able to smell the fresh air, or the scent of our skin.
You would taste the crispness of Mother Nature... and I would feel.
I feel alive.

Lyn Hernandez
3/4/2012

My Top Five 2011

I was given a challenge by a fellow blogger who is quite an amazing lady. Now...it wasn't declared a challenge, but for me I took it as one.  I've been procrastinating, and hemming and hawing about writing on my blog again.  I just didn't feel like it.  And then life took over.  My days turned to weeks and those weeks to months.  I am going to post for her Carnival with the stipulation that everyone reading this understands that I am not a traditional blogger.  I write for me.  This sometimes annoys people.  I am careless with punctuation, and/or grammar.  I love using visual aids such as photos, and youtube.  That being said,  I give you my Top Five for 2011.

I had a wonderful presentation ready, but someone knocked on my door and then I received a phone call. Both conversations made me rethink what I should do.  He does work in mysterious ways.

#5 Books.  What can I say?   I love them.  I also love children.  Some of the best books I've read are meant for children.  Regardless of the age I believe everyone should read or be read to.  My number five is a demonstration of the passion I have and  wish that all schools across America would instill in our children.

#4 Home. I am eternally grateful for the new home that Zach and I have. After years of living in such a cramped space (Yes I was grateful for the roof over my head at the time) it was such a relief to hear those words "Here's your key." It's funny how three words make such a difference in a persons life. 

#3 Neighbors. I can not believe how lucky I am to have such wonderful people watching my back. I had something happen to me last week that shook my faith in how much kindness you can actually give to your neighbors. Tonight I had an awakening. One wrong can be righted by the good of another. Never judge those around you.

 #2 Friends. I have been graced by God with the best friends a woman can ask for. I can go on forever about the wonderful people I've met this year. My Father told me when I was a kid that you can count your true friends on one hand. I know what he said is true, but I now have two hands.

 #1 Family. What would we be without them? My biggest rocks are my Mom & Dad. I am eternally grateful for everything they have done for me and my boys. My Mother & Father have given me so much this year that I could never repay them in this lifetime. My son Aaron turned 19 and became a Marine. My baby Zachary moved with me and has been braving the transition. 

So...Although my Top Five may not be the standard pop culture, or holiday ready...I am happy. And that's what counts!

Sweet dreams. 

 Lyn

Learning how to tie my shoe.

Learning how to tie a shoe.

How do you tell your child that mommy
doesn't  know the right way to tie a shoe?
Mommy doesn't want to tie her shoes.
She wants to kick them off just because it feels good.
She selfishly wants you to remain oblivious to the tainted world.
She wants barefooted days and nights,
and flip flops and floppy slippers.
No alarms in the morning or curfews at night.
So young, you only have the bedtime to worry you.
How do I tie your shoes?
I don't want to.
Not right now.
Let me show you bunny ears.
Let me show you around the tree.
In time my little man.
I will show you how to tie your shoes.


Lyn Hernandez
For Z-man
6/27/2011

Re-edited
11/21/2011

The Missing Photograph.

"Missing photo" I know I'm not crazy, so why is it I can not find you?

Snapshot from my mother's past you are grating on my nerves. You captured the essence of her beauty in its simplicity, and I want nothing more than to share that with her and the world.

Long golden locks of hair swept down her back accenting her pale skin.  The forbidden mini-skirt that was the source of many a tantrum on my part in my youth, along with Go-Go boots, made her tall frame appear goddess-like.

The lack of smile is apparent, but does not diminish the happiness in her eyes.  There is that twinkle.  The one that we as children knew expressed her joy without words.

There is no need for her to smile.

She has just been wed to my father in a quiet ceremony and is content.

She is loved.

So where are you "photograph" of this past moment in time?

You can stay hidden, but you cannot erase the image I have in my mind.

I've seen it's value, and it shall remain priceless and untouched in my memories.

For now.

Lyn

My crystal ball.

My Crystal bowl is the recipient of my current anger management.  I can't say why I chose this bowl, except that it is tied to my failed marriage.  I hated that I could not hold onto something I cherished so much.  It almost killed me to physically release myself from my bond to him.  He was my everything, but I became nothing.

I took to smoking again.  The back story is one I will post later, or maybe I won't.  I wanted to desecrate something that would give me release.  I wanted it to be something special.

Well, he has a lot of my belongings still and the few I took with me I knew I had limited choices.  Light bulb!  He had this thing about getting all the finer things in life.  "Keeping up with the Jones's." is the best cliche that suits this situation.


My mind immediately went to the Crystal bowl.  The damn crystal that I didn't want but he thought would make our home more like others.  What the hell is that about?  I wanted a home not a simulation.

So I defiled the bowl that symbolized our union.  I lit my cigarette, took a few drags, stared at the lit tip, exhaled and then crushed it out in the center where I could snuff out the name of the artist who created the work of beauty.

 No offense to the artist.  The bowl is my art now.  My therapy.

Lyn

My Frog Prince.

I stole my sons Pillow Pet.

I couldn't help myself.

It's soft and squishy, and it looked so lonely sitting on his bed.

Do you see what I mean?

Who wouldn't want

 to sleep with such

 an irresistible creature?

I know it sounds mean.

He can always trade back.

Oh....I forgot to mention that he took my Spongebob Pillow

and is refusing to give him back. Try as might, I can not seem

to get him back.  I can go to sleep with him,

but when I wake up....Poof...

He is back in Z's room.

It's probably for the best.

At least this way I can

dream of my frog

becoming a Prince.

Kidding of course.

For now.

Lyn